outside
you could hear an owl
you could see your breath
  in the deck lights

later I awoke and
heard police sirens
  and I thought I heard
someone yelling

and I thought oh great we're way the fuck out here in the country
and some crazed murderer is going to home invasion
the shit out of us
Then I started thinking about my grandfathers .32 colt police special
and how my mom gave it away at the police station
when my father was living in the downstairs bedroom
and had worsening dementia
and about the time
one night
 years ago
I must have been about thirteen
when there was a man on the road
and my dad was out there with the pistol yelling at him
while waiting for the sheriff to arrive
it was like the old west in a seventies modern style house
plunked down down the road from hard ranch houses and random barns, structures, and decaying vehicles
The guy on the road was laying down
he was drunk or on drugs
and he was yelling stuff
    somebody had probably kicked him out of their car
like an abandoned dog
          we had those too
a scruffy pekingese mix showed up at the sliding glass door one night
while we were watching tv
and scared the bejeebers out of my sister and I
  we kept him and named him Sam
Sammy!
I thought about a bunch of stuff and then I went back to sleep